That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
