if i died would you start the facebook group?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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