SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
