sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize