it wasn't lemon gatorade
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
My Sexting was not on an AP level
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
