In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
