Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
