just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Please don't give away my fajitas
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