There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
she smelled like a LAN party
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
