I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
