Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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