DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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