and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
