He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
false alarm, still single
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