I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Just high enough for therapy.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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