on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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