Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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