We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
