I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
