like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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