Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
are you so shy because you have an std?
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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