My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
