i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
