Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
