what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
