I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Randomize
