And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
