singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
