So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
