..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
