I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Randomize
