Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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