Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize