it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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