Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
