this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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