I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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