8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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