guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
