In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
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