I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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