I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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