I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
