hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Randomize
