What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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