I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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