So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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