did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
