just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
