He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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